Monthly Archives: June 2016

Me After You

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Photo Credit: Samantha Lynn Parker

My day begins with a gaze at a photograph … a memory from a few years ago when I reunited with Nathan, a childhood friend and my soulmate who died last October, after losing touch for a decade. For a moment, my eyes close to remember Nathan’s laugh, eyes, and smile. Then reality sets in and I kiss Erie—the teddy bear Nathan gave me for Valentine’s Day—before putting him back by the photograph.

My days are filled with things to do—workouts, meetings, blog post writing, catching up with friends, and so on. So often, I think of Nathan and wish he were still here. One moment, a friend may complain about her husband, while I secretly wish I could still bicker with Nathan. Take me back to when we argued all day, and I would be thrilled because it would mean one more day with him. Another moment I may have to make a decision without him, and I will be overwhelmed and wish desperately he would be here to listen. Later, I will just miss his smiling eyes and wish I could look into them again.

When news broke out about the release of the film Me Before You[i] and its theme concerning the assisted suicide of a paralyzed man, I had to pause.. I am always one looking for a way to learn how others think and react to situations. Perhaps the disabled community could learn about the inner workings of the suicidal mind. How do people decide to throw away their life? What sends people over the edge? Why is assisted suicide so appealing to some?

Many people are upset the movie portraying the disabled community in such a depressing light when most of us live normal lives. We go to college, earn degrees and masters, and have careers. We get married, have families, and sometimes get divorced. We live the human experience.

Amber Lee Wesely, a friend who has cerebral palsy like me, saw it and was disgusted with its portrayal of a rich man upset about not getting his way and giving up. My thoughts immediately turned to Nathan—how he fought to stay alive for most of his thirty-two years. There is no way I could sit through a movie romanticizing assisted suicide, not when Nathan and so many others in the disabled community fought to live.

Then there was a mass shooting on June 12, 2016, at an Orlando LGBT nightclub; forty-nine people were killed, and fifty-three were injured. Two days after the shooting The New York Times reported:

Of the 44 victims brought to the hospital, nine died within minutes of arriving, Dr. Michael L. Cheatham, a trauma surgeon at the center, said. Of the remaining 35, eight have gone home and 27 were still hospitalized on Tuesday. Six of those 27 are in critical condition, in the intensive care unit. Five others are in guarded condition, and 16 are stable.

Out of the thirty-five injured, there are bound to be those who are newly paralyzed or quadriplegic. Their new disability will be a constant reminder of that horrific night. With the LGBT community’s suicide rate already higher than the national average, the movie Me Before You might end up giving these newly injured individuals a stronger push toward taking their life. This movie tells individuals who become paralyzed or quadriplegic that they have a rightful option to die, because their life will be more difficult and provide less opportunities to make their dreams come true.

The truth of the matter is that people who are disabled, especially those paralyzed or quadriplegic, have a lot of opportunities to live life. They are able to play wheelchair softball, basketball, and rugby. There are adapted tricycles for those with these disabilities. After each Olympics Games, there is the Paralympics Games. At the summer games, these individuals complete in archery, boccia, cycling, powerlifting, rowing, sailing, equestrian sports, table tennis, swimming, sitting volleyball, wheelchair basketball, wheelchair fencing, wheelchair rugby, wheelchair tennis, and more. At the winter games, individuals complete in alpine skiing, biathlon, cross-country skiing, ice sledge hockey, and wheelchair curling. Even if you are paralyzed or quadriplegic, you can still complete in sports on a grand stage.

If you are not athletic, there are many things you can still do as an individual who is paralyzed or quadriplegic. Christopher Reeve is an actor famous for his role as Superman. After his horse-riding accident in 1995, Reeve became a quadriplegic but still continued to work in the movie industry as a director. Reeve also became an activist, serving as the Chairman of the American Paralysis Association and the Vice Chairman of the National Organization on Disability. Reeve also cofounded the Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation and the Reeve-Irvine Research Center, which researched spinal cord injuries and provided grants to individuals who were injured. Reeve wrote two books, Still Me (an autobiography) and Nothing is Impossible: Reflections on a New Life (a book on his views and life experiences). Even as a quadriplegic, Reeve led a fulfilling life.[ii]

Some people have made the argument that assisted suicide is a choice people who are disabled or ill have. People have a choice to live or die. But although those with disabilities do have to grieve some losses, there is so much more to life than giving up and ending it. God gives each individual the gift of life and purpose. If you become disabled later in life, you may question your purpose in the world, but it does not mean God cannot use you anymore. Your purpose has changed—or maybe been redirected. Maybe before becoming disabled you were headed in the wrong direction. Maybe without your disability you could not achieve your full potential. Why would Reeve work so hard to raise awareness and funding for research if life as a quadriplegic was not worth living? As a quadriplegic, Reeve continued to make a difference in the world. I believe my disability, cerebral palsy, has given me a unique perspective. It makes me slow down and allows me to think and reflect on life.

Some people fight to live to meet their grandchildren, and some fight to matter in this world, while others have suffered the terrible loss of burying their loved ones. By contrast, Hollywood decided to produce a movie on the “loving merits” of assisted suicide, even when one of their own, Reeve, fought hard to live and to find a cure for spinal cord injuries.

For me, I think of Nathan. He did not choose or want to die. He fought like hell to live as long as he could. He smiled every day and loved with his whole heart. He shared the kingdom of God with everyone who he met. Nathan always chose life.

For these many reasons, I will not watch Me Before You; I am living loss it portrays and my loved one didn’t have a choice. It’s not entertainment; it the loss of a real person. Like so many others in the disabled community, I have buried my best friend and soul mate and was given a guardian angel far too soon. I and my fellow friends with disabilities know the taste of death, have stood at our peers’ graves far too young, and hold onto their memories. There is nothing romantic about assisted suicide or death.

My days end much like they begin: a gaze at the photograph of Nathan and as I take Erie to bed with me. I survived another day without Nathan’s physical presence. The only comfort I have is knowing he is my guardian angel and continues to protect me in my weakest moments. One day, I will see Nathan again in the kingdom of God, but until then I share his love, wisdom, and memory with everyone I meet. For this reason, I continue to actively choose to live the human experience. I choose life.

[i] Me Before You is a movie based on the novel by Jo Jo Moyes. The storyline follows the unexpected relationship between a small town Englishwoman and the wealthy, paralyzed Londoner. The Englishwoman becomes the man’s caretaker, and their relationship blossoms from there.

[ii] “Christopher Reeve: Actor, Director, and Activist,” Christopher and Dana Reeve Foundation, https://www.christopherreeve.org/about-us/christopher-and-dana/christopher-reeve.

Freedom in Forgiveness

Fourth Sunday of Pentecost: Galatians 2:1 5-21 and Luke 7:36-50

Peace be with you!

In the musical Les Miserables, Jean Valjean is an ex-convict whose crime was stealing a piece of bread for a starving relative. Upon coming out of prison, Valjean is determined to turn away from the harsh life of prison and help those in need no matter the consequences. However, Valjean’s old ways die hard; he breaks parole and changes his name to hide from the authorities. Over time, he becomes owner of a factory where he gives women jobs to support their families. Javert is the police inspector who released Valjean after warning him what would happen if he broke the law again. Javert believes the law comes before anything else in life. When he finds Valjean after years of thinking he was dead, Javert is determined to bring him back into custody.

Reflection Questions: Is it ever okay to break the law or social standards? Should the law be upheld no matter what?

Paul is writing to the Galatians because the Jewish Christians are telling them they have to earn their way into heaven by doing good works. The Jewish Christians believe that they have to be justified by their works. They have to keep the laws handed down to them by Moses and their ancestors. Paul points out that if we believe keeping the law can justify us, then Jesus died for nothing (Galatians 2:21). The truth is that we cannot uphold the law on our own. Our sinful nature has been crucified through Jesus, and now we can have new life and know God the Father.

Reflection Questions: Why is it difficult to accept our brokenness and need for Jesus?

In Luke 7:36-50, Simon is outraged by Jesus allowing a sinful woman to be at his feet. As a Pharisee, Simon keeps sinners, the unclean, at a distance. Simon projects a negative identity and value to individuals who he perceives to be sinners. To Simon, the woman adds no value to society, and it would have been better if she stayed away. In today’s world, we do not always go around calling others sinners, though we do still pass judgments on others based on race, gender, age, disability, sexual orientation, economic standing, and [whatever “it” is] that creates a divide. We project an identity and a value on others based on our own narrow thoughts and opinions. For instance, many people upon meeting me think I have a cognitive disability based on my spastic movements and my unfamiliar speech pattern. These people project an image onto me based on their own opinions.

Reflection Questions: How have you been judged by others?

In Luke 7:40-50, Jesus calls Simon out on his judgment against the woman, the sinner. Jesus asks Simon, “If a creditor canceled the debts of two debtors, which one loves him more?” (see Luke 7:41-42). Simon answers, “The one who owes more,” and Jesus says, “You are correct” (see Luke 7:43). Jesus points out that the woman has bathed and anointed his feet, while Simon has done nothing to welcome him (Luke 7:44-46). Jesus says the woman is forgiven of her many sins, and therefore she expresses great love for the Lord (Luke 7:47-48, 50). We all fall short and sin against the Lord. We have all been the woman in the story who was judged. We have all needed to apologize for something we have done. We have all felt unworthy of someone’s forgiveness, yet we took a chance and asked someone to forgive us.

Reflection Questions: Why is it difficult to seek forgiveness? How do you seek forgiveness from someone else?

We have also been Simon and the others at the table who questions how someone could forgive someone who has hurt another person. We have all felt the sting of betrayal, the bitterness of being crossed, and [whatever “it” is] that hurt us. Sometimes it seems inconceivable to forgive a person.

Reflection Questions: Why is it so difficult to forgive a person? What makes some betrayals harder to forgive than others?

However, Jesus forgives even the inconceivable sins when we humbly repent. Jesus understands we are broken—unable to live according to God’s will without an intervention. Jesus understands he has to provide a way for us to be right and in a relationship with God the Father. Jesus willingly dies on the cross for the redemption of our sins. Jesus gives us a chance to have a personal relationship with God the Father through his crucifixion, death, and resurrection. Therefore, despite our inconceivable sins, we can join Jesus at the table to share a meal with him. We are able to be know God’s love and to call upon him at any time. We are able to express God’s love to others, because we know the power of forgiveness.

Paul writes that the Galatians are justified by their faith in Jesus Christ who died for their sins on the cross. There is no way anyone can earn their way into heaven on their own merit (Galatians 2:16). If we live according to the law, we are dead (Galatians 2:19) because we cannot fulfill the law on our own. In Luke 7:36-39, Simon treats the woman as though she is dead and has no right to be in contact with Jesus (making him unclean), and yet Jesus forgives her; her current actions speak to her repentance. Like the woman, we have skeletons in our closets too. We have broken our relationship with God the Father, yet we are able to be forgiven through Jesus Christ’s crucifixion, death, and resurrection.

Reflection Questions: When have you had to seek forgiveness from Jesus? How did it feel to need forgiveness? Did anyone say you did not deserve forgiveness?

Paul calls the Galatians to live by faith in Jesus Christ who gave up his life out of love for them (Galatians 2:20). God did not have to send Jesus to die for our sins, but he loves us so deeply he gives us eternal life in him. There is nothing we can do to undo his love for us. By living in faith, we receive the gift of life given to us through Jesus Christ’s crucifixion, death, and resurrection. In Luke 7:44-46, the woman lives out her faith through a selfless act of washing and anointing Jesus’s feet. She humbly seeks forgiveness, even when she has no right to. Jesus tells the woman, “Your sins are forgiven. Your faith has saved you; go in peace” (Luke 7:48, 50 NRSV). Jesus sends the woman out into the world with his peace—the love and mercy of God.

Reflection Questions: How do you live out your faith? How have you felt Jesus’s peace in the world?

In Les Miserables, Valjean and Javert meet in different situations over the years. Somehow Valjean always escapes and goes into hiding until Javert finds him again. At one point Valjean has an opportunity to kill Javert, but he lets him go. Javert realizes Valjean lives by a different moral code than the strict law. Valjean strives to help those who cannot help themselves, even if it means breaking the law. This is what Paul is telling the Galatians. It is better to love each other than to judge one another. Forgiveness frees us from our past mistakes. Forgiveness grants us a second chance. Forgiveness moves us pass raw emotions in order to repair relationships with one another. When we forgive and love each other, we are living out our faith in Jesus Christ.

Reflection Questions: When have you challenged a law or social standard to help someone else?

Thanks be to God!

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for having Jesus Christ die for our sins so we can have life. Help us to live according to your word, even if it means going against man-made laws. Accept our pleas for forgiveness as we forgive those who have sinned against us. Grant us your love, mercy, and peace through your son Jesus Christ. Amen.

The Good News of Jesus Christ, not People

Big & Rich own the rights to the lyrics and music. Video found on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6j22H2hxGHo.

 

Third Sunday of Pentecost: Galatians 1:11-24

Peace be with you!

Have you ever watched a television evangelist preaching about fiery hell? “Call my 800 number to make a donation to [whatever “it” is] and receive answers to all your prayers!” I giggle every time I hear Big and Rich’s song “Filthy Rich.” The second verse goes:

I saw a preacher on the TV

With big diamond rings on his hand

He was beggin’ for some money

He said to send us every penny you can

 

I guess the good Lord’s got a mortgage

And a payment on a yacht in the Keys

So we better keep sendin’ our hard earned livin’

To those God-fearin’ folks on TV[i]

Television evangelists asking for your money is nonsensical. God answers prayers in his own timing. Sure, Deuteronomy 14:22 says we should tithe to the Lord a tenth of our income. As a Christian, you are a child of God, and God has given all that you own. Therefore, when you give, you give back to God what is his. However, God does not care how much you give. There is no specific amount of money to guarantee your entry into the kingdom of God or the answering of your prayers. Jesus wants us to help those in need, freely and without compulsion. Making donations to your local church, Lutheran Services, Feeding America, National Ability Center, Compassion, World Vision, Charity:Water, and [whatever “it” is] you believe in helps others. The church or the organization should have some accreditations outlining how it will use the donations, so the givers know where their money is being used and what for.

Reflection Questions: What are some of your favorite nonprofits or causes? How do you help those in need?

Paul’s critics have been in Galatia questioning his accreditations among the people who are supporting his church and mission. His critics are asking the Galatians if they know Paul has persecuted Christians in the past and questioning how they can follow such a person. They do not understand how a man who grew up as a faithful Jew can turn his back on the Jewish traditions and speak about salvation through faith in Jesus Christ. The very person Paul persecuted others for following he now calls his Savior and calls others to follow.

Blasphemy!

Jews are attacking Paul’s conversion—his flipping sides. Jews do not understand how someone rejects a message one minute, and then the next minute is willing to die for the same message. As Christians, we can find hope in Paul’s conversion for our family members, friends, and colleagues who do not know or have a personal relationship with Jesus. We understand the resistance Paul is facing from his Jewish contemporaries. We know people who reject the good news too. We know how it feels to watch people who say they are Christian acting to the contrary.

Reflection Questions: How do non-Christians or other Christians criticize you? How do you handle the criticism? How does Paul’s example change how you will handle criticism?

The Jewish contemporaries resist any change to their faith traditions and do not accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior. Paul’s message of the good news threatens the Jewish faith system and questions their ways of life. His critics question Paul’s authority to start churches in the name of Jesus and to tell people that they are saved by grace through faith in Jesus Christ; after all, Paul never personally knew Jesus when he was alive. How can someone have faith in an individual whom he never met?

Paul answers his critics with the snarky truth. “My accreditations,” he explains, “come from Jesus Christ’s revelation on the road to Damascus” (see Galatians 1:11-12). His accreditations do not come from a human origin; they come from the Lord God. As we noted in the last devotion, Paul is not looking for a “attaboy” from his contemporaries. Paul has made a lifestyle change; he is living for Jesus Christ—no one else. Paul is working on spreading the good news of Jesus Christ’s saving grace through Jesus’s crucifixion, death, and resurrection. Paul is looking to bring others into a relationship with God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit.

Reflection Questions: Has anyone ever questioned your faith? How can you believe in an individual who died and rose two thousand years ago?

Paul does not give in to his critics. Paul confesses his past sins: he persecuted Christians before his revelation and advanced quickly within the structures of Judaism (Galatians 1:13-14). He is up-front with the Galatians and hides nothing about his past.

However, Paul is not who he was before his revelation. Now he takes no orders originating from humans; Paul’s orders come from God the Father through Jesus Christ. Through a revelation, Jesus calls Paul to share the good news wherever he goes and with whomever he meets. Paul’s life is transformed by his revelation from Jesus. Paul goes from a persecutor of Christians to a preacher of the good news and lives as a called Christian.

Reflection Questions: How has your faith changed you? Has it given you peace? Has it given you a purpose?

We are all called to share the good news wherever we go and with whomever we meet. You do not have to be called to preach to share the good news. You can be a doctor or a nurse who shares God’s compassion with your patients, a lawyer who shows mercy and grace to your clients, a chef who feeds the hungry, an accountant who protects the poor, an advocate who gives a voice to the silent, a parent who loves your children, a bus driver who cares for their passengers, or a [whatever “it” is] you do to share the good news. Paul uses the skills he learned in the Jewish faith system and as a Roman to spread the good news with the world. No matter what you do, God calls upon you to share the good news by living out the Christian faith. No matter what happened in your past, God offers you grace, mercy, forgiveness, and love. No matter what, God calls upon you to do his will in the world.

Reflection Questions: How has someone used your past against you? How did you try to change their perspective of you? How has your past made you a stronger Christian?

Thanks be to God!

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for giving Paul a revelation through Jesus Christ to change his heart toward you. Help us to work past the criticism of others and to continue to spread the good news, no matter who tries to stand in our way. Remind us we are all called to share the good news in our daily lives. Guide us to use our resources to feed the hungry, to protect the poor, to give the silent a voice, to heal the sick, and to clothe the naked. Thank you for calling us to be your voice and to act son your behalf in this world. Amen.

[i] Big and Rich, “Lyrics: ‘Filthy Rich,’” Google Play Music, https://play.google.com/music/preview/T3dsir65rbovtlscdu2rqvsswgq?lyrics=1&utm_source=google&utm_medium=search&utm_campaign=lyrics&pcampaignid=kp-lyrics&u=0#.